Botswana - Sept 2018

Hello on our last day in southern Africa.

We stayed at two camps in the Okavango delta, one wet and the other dry.  The animals have been amazing and plentiful.  On the last day at Kanana camp (wet) we spent three quarters of an hour with a female leopard and at the final camp we’ve seen leopards every day plus lion cubs.  As Warren Zevon might say we were delighted with a litany of lounging and leaping lithe leopards in late afternoon.

The Botswanan people are friendly and proud of their nation, plus they have managed to avoid the “African disease” that took over Zimbabwe, is a wip in South Africa and might well infect Namibia.  Their Independence Day is September 30th so we joined in the celebrations.

Caught a bunch of fish at Kanana including African pike, bream, nembwe (like a bass), silver catfish and sharp-tooth catfish (which don’t have any teeth).  The staff at the lodge used the fish for their national day celebrations.

Further learnings and stuff:

* Far too much instant brown water available in southern African states and they call it “classic coffee”

* With not much too do in their spare time, the boys engage in Impala poo spitting contests which are as much a test of skill as taste buds

* The national colours are the same as the Cronulla Sharks

* Had a Russell Coight moment when returning elated from fishing as I passed another boat of guests, including Brenda, almost fell out of my boat when it accelerated

* There seems to be a need to rename lots of birds, which is clearly a conspiracy of twitchers and book publishers

* For example, the ring necked dove and white crowned lapwing, artists formally known as turtle dove and plover

* The sausage tree, a favourite of leopards in which to hide and for antelope to eat, is also regarded as the means of penis enhancement

* Elephant dung apparently cures everything from pimples to dementia

* Seniors moments - eating breakfast at 6am, lunch at 11am and asleep before dinner

* Seniors fun moments - ticking off the animal and bird sighting book provided by the camps and discussing them at breakfast

* I think we are being conditioned for life over sixty

* The Jesus bird - walks on water

* The red, yellow, grey and brown horn bills, aka chilli, banana, mushroom and…..

* The undertaker bird was surely the inspiration for Lurch from the Adams family

* I’m struggling with differentiating eerons and hegrets

* Ring necked doves are the rappers of the bird world

* Recipe for mole rat stew - combine some freshly caught mole rats with herbs and spices and some river stones in a pot and simmer for five hours.  Throw away the mole rats and eat the stones as there are softer and more nutritious

* I can show you how to catch mole rats

* Wifi “hot” spot at Machaba camp was literally a picnic table in a scorching part of the bush running through the camp

* Elephants and hippos are proof salad can make you fat

* Castle lager is a nice beer and apparently international beer of the year 1997

* My favourite was the black label lager from South Africa followed by Windhoek draft

* Swamp boo boo had several meanings for our guide (Kitso) including a bird, getting bogged in the river mud and only bringing light beer on the afternoon game drive

* Safari mondegreen - bon appetit = born in a tree

* Jack cheese is prevalent, to which Brenda commented ironically “Jack-$hit”

See you back in Oz.